Quotation of the Day

Sunday, February 2, 2014

"It's Not As Cool As 'Dora The Explorer's' Backpack.... But It's A Great Help For Someone On The Street!"

Good Morning;

So... this is a video posted on Facebook by my cousin Barbara from L.A.
She is vacationing in Seattle where she came across this way to help out
homeless folks with both consumable and lasting products for about
$20.00.

http://www.wimp.com/homelessbackpack/

Later............................ Dave

Thursday, January 16, 2014

" Priorities...........................!!!!! "

Good Evening;

So.... I bought a Rival brand Mr. Coffee knockoff, and a T-Mobile mobile hotspot.
Still no furniture, but with caffeine and internet access, I'll never miss it! .... LOL!

Later.............................Dave

Thursday, January 2, 2014

"Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow...., (Raising My Fist To The Sky In A One Finger Salute)... OR... Cold Weather STILL SUCKS, ....But Now I've Got A Place To Escape It !!!!!!!!!!!!..."

Good Evening;

So........ Greetings and Hallucinations, Salutations and Felicitations for the New Year! May 2014 be as good to you as it is starting out for me.
My apologies both for my long absence and that this post is only going to be a short, short, update. There will be a longer, denser and more complete posting in a few days, just keep checking back.

Well I am sitting here in the Enoch Pratt Free Library on Thursday night January 2nd, 2014.... in the middle of the new years first snowstorm! But, 'No Worries", 
as our friends 'down under' say, because it is only about 5 blocks to.....
wait for it............ My New Apartment!!!!!!!!!!

Yup.... Homelesscide is now technically a misnomer!

I don't have WIFI yet, here in...... Hampden!
so I'll be using the library until I figure out which way to go,
mobile broadband or an in house Xfinity or FIOS hookup.

As of now my furnishings consist of an inflatable queen size bed/mattress,
(which is actually really, really comfortable), a scavenged TV/Microwave cart
with broken (and removed) casters as my kitchen table, and a 5 gallon 'drywall mud' bucket with a couple short boards and Yellow Pages phone books to raise it to the right height, as my chair/stool. And of course my little digital mini TV,
my mini DVD/CD player, (and a clock radio which I scarfed from Jenn....lol).

It's now snowing much harder so I'm heading home....(HOME!).

More very soon, to catch everyone up on the past 6 months, I promise.
(and please remember that 'soon' is a variable not a constant.... ;-)  )


Later................................ Dave

(and a grateful thanks to Cheryl)

Thursday, September 26, 2013

"Doing The Right Thing.................Regardless! ........."

Good Morning;

Well..... I'm still here, and still waiting on word about my apartment in Hampden. It was supposed to be ready for inspection by HABC on this past Monday, but....?? Twice before issues related to construction and/or materiel forced a postponement.
Got my fingers crossed!

Here is a link to another Joel John Roberts essay from "Poverty Insights",
about the media's preconceived notion that the "Homeless" are all without morals, or honesty, despite all their own stories and reports of examples to the contrary.

(And there is a LARGE blank/white area before the text starts, so please scroll down before you exit thinking it's a bad link)

http://www.povertyinsights.org/2013/09/23/found-and-lost/

Later.............................Dave

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

"Hiatus............. And/Or................. Hibernation"

Good Morning!

So.... if anyone has been wondering... yes I'm still alive and well! I just have not been inspired to write anything at all recently... like for the past month and a half. Still waiting to hear when the apartment in Hampden will be ready, and inspected, so I can meet with the landlord and the caseworker from HABC and I can sign the lease. Hopefully any day now.

I'm still back at Jenn's and things are a whole lot less stressful since she tossed her husband out for good. I've been earning my keep bigtime since she both got a full time job AND took on 13 credits as a full time student at BCCC.
She works the midnight shift and I've been putting the grandmonsters to bed  most nights and also picking them up from school in the afternoon, plus the usual cooking and laundry, etc., etc., etc.

As soon as I get settled in my new apt. (if not sooner) I'll be back with more.

Later..........................Dave

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

"Apartment Follies...... Round Three; ........ And..... Ouch, Ouch, Ouch....."

Good Afternoon;
Well it's a 'helluva day in the neighborhood', to butcher Mr. Roger's greeting.
I feel like two bags of dead mice again, it's one of those 'perfect storm' situations when ALL my meds are out at the same time, and I can't renew until AFTER seeing the doctors again.... and the earliest appointments were a week after the meds ran out, plus I'm out of bupes and my supplier for them is in the hospital.
 
I see the docs on the 5th of August, if my BP doesn't explode my heart before then.

Free Advice : Don't Become; Old, Crippled And Crazy!

But tomorrow is 'check day' and I hope to find a temporary source when I head in town in the morning.
I am here at Jenn's and I have to meet with the caseworker from HABC about 2:00 pm. to get my voucher extension approved. If I can work p
ut the time factor I am going to meet the owner or agent of an apartment in Hampden that I hope to get into. They are about to begin to put in a new kitchen this week and hopefully the HABC inspection process will be able to be done as soon as that is finished, and NO OTHER fixes are needed. I am hoping for  September 1st move in date, to take advantage of another month's S.S.I. payment to put together down payments for rent and utility.

More as it develops.....

Later...............................Dave


Wednesday, July 24, 2013

"Again.... The Light At The End Of The Tunnel Turns Out To Be The Headlight Of An Oncoming, Out Of Control, Locomotive......"

Good Evening;

Well..... somehow I kind of expected this kind of shit to happen.
Just when I thought that the last of the idiocy was over, that I might actually be moving into an apt. with in a few weeks.... I get kicked in the balls by fate again. The woman in the leasing office I had an appointment with this morning, at the building I thought I was nearly cleared to enter picks up my application and the first thing she says is,

 "Oh, Dave.... you're only 57!"

.... Well yeah, with a disability determination, a voucher, and S.S.I., like the requirements state....

"Oh.. I must have missed that, we only have openings for the OVER 62 apts."

Suck my nuts!!!

Well at least I have to give her credit for trying to help after this major letdown.
The building, (and the next two mentioned also), are Harry and Jeanette Weinberg Senior and Disability Living facilities, the first one, was called Manhattan Park.
The leasing agent there called the Weinberg Place bldg. and told me to call the leasing agent there after 3:00 pm, (this was at Noon), so all afternoon my ulcer was getting a lovely workout as I tried not to build any hopes that would be shattered..... which they were because  it turns out that my voucher cannot be used in that bldg. because it is classed as "Public Housing"... which is a level below what I am eligible for!
Because these are all H.U.D.  buildings the allocation and category process for which units can go to who or which agency or what type of payment method is a bureaucratic nightmare written in stone.... No Exceptions... logical or not.

This leasing agent gave me the number of yet another building in there circle, Weinberg Manor East, (which happen to be right next door to the last place I lived with Rachel and the 'ex', before and after shit all blew up, and even after she moved out and I was squatting in the garage or the basement.... oh the crazy circles of Smalltimore....lol..... ['cause I gotta laugh to keep from crying right now..... or slitting my wrists and calling it quits].....), and which I was not able to talk to a human but left what is probably a crazed, semi-coherent, frantic sounding voice mail, and a rather more rational e-mail immediately afterwards.... and which I have not yet received a response.... I'm hoping that it is because it was close to or after business hours.... (PLEASE!!! Be that reason.....lol).

So.... anyway I'm about as happy as one can expect right now, and barely hanging on to what little faith or sanity I have left.

Oh, and topping it all off, I'm sleeping out on the street somewhere tonight..... and the weather is actually supposed to be fairly cool tonight....
which is again to be expected, because I only have tee shirts and shorts with me..... and no more money until the 1st of August.

Thanks for letting me bitch and moan....... lol!

Later............... Dave

Friday, July 19, 2013

"Too Damn Hot To Think Of A Cute Title........................."

Good Morning;

So..... Hot enough for you? -- It's not the heat it's the humidity! -- Dewpoint/Heat Index/Real Feel Temperature/Heat Dome/Code Red Alert/Heat Wave!

All just synonyms for:
"Extremely Hot Weather Sucks!"

I've been here at Jenn's since Saturday afternoon, July 6th, when she asked me to come back up and watch the dogs and cats for a few days while she and the kifds went camping with a friend of hers and her kids, at Cunningham Falls, near Thurmont, Md.  You may be wondering why I said yes after my reports of the rising tensions and stresses that hot their bursting point bat the end of June, forcing my decision to leave here the previous weekend, with no intention of returning any time soon...
Well, the major external stressor, her husband Tom, the perfect poster child for an "Anger Management Outreach Drive" is gone. She enforced the already extant restraining order after letting her determination slip and her guard drop as he gradually worked his way back into the house bit by bit and room by room as all the old habits reasserted themselves and the "reforms and rehabilitations" vanished into thin air like the illusions they were and the verbal and psychological abuse and manipulations began to resurface. On his birthday, July 3rd, things again crossed the line, luckily I was not there and my daughter was strong enough to handle it... again, this time... So far I've tried to refrain from any active involvement, but.... DV is DV.
Any Inferrred Implied Insinuated Extrapolations Are An Intellectual Exercise, Loyal Reader.
(wink wink, nod, nod)

So Jenn and I had a talk about money, --I have none; Food Stamps, --what I have will be contributed; and other contributions,-- cooking, feeding the kids, watching the kids so she can get re-integrated with her support network, cleaning, etc.
We are both calmer and saner, with the ability to discuss issues or problems, or grating on the nerves behaviors again active and not suppressed under the overlying rage that was coloring our relationship.

As I am writing this I just received a phone call from Sean at HCH telling me my Photo ID from the Md. MVA finally showed up in the mail there. I was at the MVA on the 3rd of July and told it would take 4 to 7 days....
HMMMM......in my world 19(th) minus 3(rd) equals 16!
... now I can finally get to the Apartment bldg. with my paperwork and IDs on Monday to start their processing. I still have to get that paperwok back to HABC for their processing afterwards.
I found out yesterday that even though my HCVP Voucher has an expiration date of 08/06/2013 on the paper I am olding in my hand,.... it actually expires on 07/24/2013 and I have to get to HABC before then to get an extension.
 God, I fucking hate gov't. bureaucracy!

Anyway, I need to go up to the kid's bedroom, one of the 2 rooms in this house with A/C, and lower my core temperature back down to somewhere around 100 degrees...... LOL....(NOT!!!).
This old farmhouse is miserably hot, with a sheetmetal roof, and the extended heatwave has not allowed it to cool off below 85 degrees minimum...INSIDE....AT NIGHT!

Later......................................Dave

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Good Afternoon;
So....another excellent essay by Joel John Roberts of Poverty Insights;


http://www.povertyinsights.org/2013/07/09/dont-call-me-crazy-just-because-i-am-homeless/#idc-container

Reminds you of this doesn't it?
********
Inner Vision
********
Don't tell me about MY reality
*Don't try to delineate MY illusions
YOU have not walked in my shoes
*YOU have not lived in my skin
----
Where YOU see a crazy man
*Talking to himself on the bus
I see a kindred soul
*Crying out for solace to a deaf world
----
YOU may have some sympathy
*But you'll never understand
YOU see only the facade
*I see Insanity from the Inside
----
Where You see a diamond
*Sharp edged bright and beautiful
I see a house of mirrors
*Trapping me in the midst of endless reflections
----
So DON"T tell me about MY reality
*If I can't define it
How the Hell can YOU
*Blinded by the light of your ego
--------
dbc...1/11/00


Later..................................Dave

Saturday, June 29, 2013

"NOT A Happy Camper.......... Again!..............."

Good Evening;

Well, I'm back on the street, sleeping outdoors until everything finally comes together with the Voucher, the Apt., my Birth Certificate, and my MVA Photo ID.
Hopefully no more than a month.

Last night was spent sitting either behind or in front of the Pikesville library at the picnic table of park bench.... tonight ???

Things reached a point of no return at my daughter's, and for a variety of reasons it was better just to slip away into the humidity rather than emulate the pop-up thunderstorms that are a trademark of summer here. Better to shut up than blow up.

More will be revealed....

Later.........................Dave

Sunday, June 23, 2013

"Any Port In A Storm........."

Good Afternoon;

So anyone have a place in or near Baltimore on the bus/train line where I can crash tonight.

I need to get to another meeting with my caseworker/therapist tomorrow at 2:00 pm. and I have no ride into town in the morning, but I do tonight. I'm NOT sleeping on wet pavement or benches!

Write me here, email me, hit me on FB, call my cell phone, [..if you don't have it yet, write me here and we'll exchange information... ;-) ..]

Later.........................Dave

Saturday, June 22, 2013

"Stress.......... Respite........... Stress............ Relief............ Joyful Shock........... Mild Depression............ Steadily Building Alternating Anxiety & Anticipation............ Shot Through With Undertones of Hurt And Anger.......... "

Good Evening;

Well............ It's good to be on nice terms with the ex-wife...AND her live-in boyfriend!

 Thursday evening I caught a ride to the Timonium Fairgrounds Light Rail stop with Jenn as she was on the way to her homegroup meeting..... it was a very quiet ride, with maybe 30 words spoken from the time we left the house up in East Bumf*ck, (Upperco), until we arrived at the L.R., where by necessity some communication was needed to discuss my getting back on Friday.

(The tension here at her house is really getting to the point of extreme discomfort, especially as there is little attempt , or reciprocation of any attempt, to communicate. Plus the weather is again about to get hot, humid, and nasty....and I'm here in the rooms without A/C....... and I'm pretty much trapped here due to the collapse of the arrangements and promises made, and having absolutely no cash left after laying out an ungodly amount here. Plus the the basic reason why I'm here has been twisted beyond the original decree..... and I've got to leave this alone now before I say too much.)

But I digress.... I again stayed at Rachel's mom's Thursday night, (same as last week),  after stopping at Monkee's to pick up meds for the next week. Rachel was asleep but when I got up at 6:00 am. she was curled up on the couch watching TV. We got a chance to visit  over coffee before I had to catch the bus to the train to the bus to H.C.H.

I had a meeting arranged  with the Social Work Dept. to get documentation and a money order to be able to get my Birth Certificate without a current/valid photo ID. After some initial confusion because the woman I actually saw was not the woman I was slated to see, the Dept. head, who had the exact details of my case, which varied slightly from what she usually dealt with, and reversed the order in which they normally send people to the MVA and Vital Records. But once I insisted they check the fine print on both websites, my concerns were addressed and off I went. I took the bus, train & bus out to Reisterstown Rd. Plaza near the apts. where Jenn used to live, where Maryland State Vital Records has an office. If my visit there was to be described by a movie title....... "Gone In 60 seconds" .........would be an uncontested winner!! In, up to the window, drop the paperwork and money order, staple, stamp, stamp, take a receipt, and out the door!! Now I wait a week to 10 days (Hopefully!!!) for it to be mailed out to H.C.H. which is my mailing address and the agency vouching for my identity. Then, off to the MVA,  which also mails out the photo ID,... to H.C.H. again. Then, about 2 and 1/2 weeks from now I can finally get to the apt. bldg and fill out their paperwork and submit to their background checks, then I have to take the approved rental application to H.A.B.C. so they can inspect it, then they negotiate the rent between them, and I can move in.

My H.C.V.P. voucher expires on August 6th and I am drowning in anxiety about the dwindling time window..... "tick....tick....tick....tick" AND  'tic....tic....tic....tic'

Anyway, even though I lost out on the security deposit assistance that was available but expires as the money runs out on June 30th with the end of the fiscal year, I should have enough with my July S.S.I . payment, though with the other 2 pre-arranged payouts I have to make in early July, I may be dining at the Dunkin' Dumpster until August............. LOL!

More info as it arrives...........

Later....................................Dave

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

"Blinded By The Light?..........................."

Good Afternoon;

Well......... Another great essay by Joel John Roberts from "Poverty Insights";

http://www.povertyinsights.org/2013/06/18/come-out-of-the-shadows/

Later..................................Dave

Monday, June 17, 2013

"Bureaucratic Vicious Circles............... & ............... Bench Bunking............"

Good Evening;

Well...... After a run of 2 months, 3 weeks, and 1 day, I broke my vow and was forced to spend Friday night sleeping on the street, actually the metal bench outside the Pikesville Library. On Thursday night I spent the night at my ex'es, (Rachel's Mom's), apt. with her, her boyfriend/partner/significant other, and her 2nd oldest daughter, my former step-daughter, who lives with them, Rachel was at the beach at the Md. Bar Association Convention with her Bubbie and Zaidie... It's a strange complicated dynamic, but why should this aspect of my life be any simpler than any other?......... LOL!! I'm just happy we get along and I'm able to crash there in a pinch for something important like this, (that has an impact on Rachel too), and that we all get along socially.

I had come into town from out here in East Bumfuck on Thursday night because I had to get a copy of my birth certificate and get over to the apartment building I am trying to move into to start the paperwork. It's going to take at least 20 days from the time I turn it in to HABC for inspection and approval, and probably a week for the apt.complexes paperwork to go through.

Well... I got to Vital Records, filled out the paperwork for a copy of my birth certificate, (which costs $24.00 now!!!), and handed it in, then waited an hour. Then,... I was called to the counter and told that my ID had expired and the other ID was no longer accepted... A STATE ID!!!! Which I was supposed to be told in the first place. They said they could mail one.... in about 2 weeks, if I went and got a letter from where ever I wanted it mailed that it was okay for me to get my mail there.... um I don't HAVE another 14-17 days to waste! I got my money back and left.

 So.... it was early enough that I went to get a new ID, knowing I would not have enough money for the both certificate too, (but I couldn't get back there until Monday at the earliest anyway... so that was moot.), and had another fun experience.
Without my birth certificate or other papers I don't have available easily or at all 
 I can't get another ID at the MVA.
Catch 22?

I have to call HCH and talk to my caseworker tomorrow, Monday, morning...EARLY, and see if I can come down for a walk-in appt. on Tuesday to get help with an ID and Birth Certificate.... ASAP!!! If so, I'll ride in on Monday night when my son-in-law leaves here to go 'home', (don't!  even!!  ask!!!.. I can't get into that here and now), and spend the night... ??????, who the hell knows?!?

I got my voucher on the 6th of June,and between being trapped up here when I needed to get into town and having spent most of my cash in the past 2 months on household expenses here, and money lent out that is not being repaid as promised... I am out of cash and starting to feel like I'm not just stuck, but fucked.
The living situation here has become untenable, and the day to day tension can be cut with a knife.

I've got to stop here....... too much emotional investment to be objective......
it's family............... 'nuff said.


Later...........................Dave